Depp Impact

I just watched The Secret Window last night. Actually, I slept through the middle 30 minutes, but I got the gist. I know, it's, like, two years old, but our Netflix queue has 190 movies in it and it just came up.

Anyhow, remember my reminiscence re: "I love you/Me too"?

In the movie, Johnny Depp's housekeeper says something like:

"You're a good man, Mr. Rainey."

And he replies:

"You, too, Mrs. Garvey."

That's all.


Snap, snap, grin, grin, wink, wink

I've got a school email account I rarely check. I only ever get spam. This was my inbox when I went in for my quarterly email dump:

I don't know Penny Lewis, but I really appreciate the sentiment.

Eupemisms can indeed be cumbersome.

Like "Talk to a man about a horse." What a mouthful. Just say you gotta pee.

On the other hand, euphemisms can be enjoyable. It is more fun to talk about Sam Hill than Hell. And I do appreciate the people who choose to yell "Judas Priest!" instead of invoking the name of Jesus. Unless they're invoking Rob Halford. Which I guess is possible.

There's the line from Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf? where George asks:

"Martha, will you show her where we keep the... uh... euphemism?"

Good stuff, that.

Hey, it just occured to me. The hippos George & Martha, are they so named because of Edward Albee's play? Probably. Huh.

Good stuff, that.

So, Penny. I never did read your email. I just assumed that "euphemism cumbersome" was your way of saying that you had a line on some cut-rate penis-enlargement, and opted out.

And now that I think on it, that's actually a pretty apropos random phrase for spam-filter-evading software to pick for a title.

Good stuff indeed.


Getcher Motor Runnin'

Local public radio told me today that "most crashes occur on two-lane roads, not highways."

Maybe I don't know what a highway is. In my mind, a highway is a two-lane road.

This is actually something that I've historically gotten confused. As I look up definitions, I find that there's not a ton of consensus, and some of the definitions depend on where you're from.

I've always gone with:

Freeway: uses on- and off-ramps. So the traffic flow is, like, free.
Expressway: same as a freeway, but bigger, and, maybe faster.
Highway: can be multiple lanes, can be limited-access, but can also be two-lane country roads. Two-lane country road is usually what I think of when I hear "highway". As in: "I grew up in a small town with a blinker light off Highway 46."
Parkway: no idea what this is.

As I did a little (very little) research, I found that many stories stating the "most crashes on two-lane roads" fact specify undivided two-lane roads, like the ones I'm thinking of. I guess the story I heard needed to specify this.

Maybe "highway" is too generic. How about a new word? Maybe just call the divided highways "high ways". You know, divided.

No, that's stupid. "Divideways"? Gack.

Never mind.


I &hearts I

Jack Bauer saves the world.

Well, not yet. But he's close. There's still a crazy Russian out there.

Any-hoo. After many near-deaths, he comes in to the hospital room of his gal, and she says:

"I missed you."

He says:

"Me, too."

She says:

"You missed you, too?"

Not, really.

That last part I made up.

Now, I know this is a common thing.

I love you. Me, too.

I've always thought it weird, though.

You, too?


Thing One and Thing Two

Thing the First
Arby's still doesn't list its new gyro on their site, so I continue to get 100+ people a day visiting. Also, this weekend I passed the Battle Creek Arby's marquee which reads:


So, it must be a thing. Just not a very smart thing, IMHO.

Thing The Second
Jan Freeman's column this week includes a poll, to see how much of a prescriptivist you really are. She points out that my boy Ambrose threw down with some Rules back in the day, some of which now seem quite dated and laughable.

To which I say "Yeah, so?"

Go check it out and vote for yourself.

I'll even openly admit that I went with "oblique" on this one, and on further research, rather regret it.

9. ''On the photocopied sheet she gives students, Ms. Yamamoto includes guidelines that are _____ at first: 'Destroy many paintings,' ''Meditation is through Sumi-e, therefore long conversation is not allowed in class.'''

C. obscure
A. obtuse
B. oblique
Total votes: 25