8.24.2005

Three Short Bits

Unce
The Wiggles have a camel song with this rhyme:
From Abu Dhabi to Australia
In the desert a camel won't fail ya

Awesome.

Tice
A hospital billboard in town uses this headline:

QUALITY. HOMETOWN. CARE.

Shouldn't these one-word statements be parallel? As I read them, I get that this hospital is (of) quality, it is (in my) hometown, and that it is... care. I realize that they mean to say that they care, but then they would also be saying that they quality, no? Bill Walsh had a nice bit about this a while back.

Fee Tines
I don't often go about telling people of funnies I made earlier. They are never funny out of context. But I am quite proud of a joke no one in the car laughed at, and I share it here. If this makes me a Big Fat Egohead, so be it.

SEVEN YEAR OLD SON PLAYING WITH BALLOON: Daddy, do you know what's keeping my balloon down?
DADDY: Is it The Man?

Correction: I laughed.

Bonus Fourth Bit
For, like, a week now, Sir Paul's My Love has been in and out of my head:

Wo-wo-wo-wo-wo-wo , my love does it good.

Such crazy grammar. Such schmaltz. Yet, there it is. Every morning. Can't kick it it.

4 comments:

  1. Why can't "quality hometown care" just mean "quality care available in your home town"? My trusty Occam's razor says that it's a cheaper hypothesis to dispense with the periods than to construct a linguistic theory to account for them.

    ReplyDelete
  2. If, anon, you mean that they should ditch the periods, huzzah.
    If you mean my overcomplicated reading of the headline is a violation of OR, I would submit that their crazy hipper-than-though text is the violator.
    BTW, did you know that I liked the Occam's Razor so much, I bought the company?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Your KJV needs a little work.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Uh, thou, yes. Hipper-than-thou.
    Though, hippier than thou, as well.

    ReplyDelete