4.25.2006

Make Money Writing Kids' Books!

First, if you're here about Gyros, click here. It's not what you're looking for, but you might laugh.

I've decided that the crowded kids-book market isn't that hard to crack, after all.
You just need a great idea, right?
All those out-of-work writers just aren't creative enough.
Because every kids' book I look at in the store is a revelation, rarely a recycling-of-tired-themes in the bunch.

So.

Not only do I have a great idea for a kids' book.
I have TWO great ideas.
And I'm sharing them with you.
For free.
You're welcome.

Kids' Book Idea That'll Make Me Rich #1
Characters That Grow Old

I know. It sounds so simple, doesn't it? But it rarely happens. Yes, Harry Potter's aging, but I'm talking kids' books, here. Like Clifford. Not only is he no older than he was 40 (280) years ago, he's getting younger. Will Arthur ever make it to fourth grade? No. He won't.
Ostensibly, this is because we want Arthur et al to appeal to the next generation of third-graders. They become timeless.
I submit, though, that there is a market out there for characters we can grow up with. If Arthur's Glasses can help assuage fears of kids getting new specs, couldn't Arthur Finds Hair In Strange Places help them deal with those gawky tween years?
Answer: Yes, it could.
Now, I just have to come up with my own character. I'm thinking of starting out with a board book series featuring an anthropomorphized Howler Monkey named Charlie Howler. Some titles:

Howler's Friends
Howler at the Zoo
Howler Goes Zoom

In a few years, I release

Howler Rides a Bike
Howler and the Dentist
Howler and the Emergency Appendectomy

Titles to look for down the road include

Charlie Howler's SAT Study Guide
Charlie Howler at Sweet Valley University (see crossovers)
Mr. Howler and the Audit
Turkish Prison Blues (an Inspector Howler Mystery)
How Charlie Got His Groove Back
Howler's Colonoscopy
The Five People Charlie Meets In Heaven

Kids' Book Idea That'll Make Me Rich #2

Crossovers

Coming soon.

4 comments:

ACoolKid said...

For the real scoop on the Kid Lit market, Strong Bad is still the On Point King.

Still funny...
Though I don't know how much he made from setting all the kids on fire...

Kyle said...

Man, that'd suck to write yourself out of a job by killing off your character.

I would like to see Mark Trail (albeit, a comic) kick the bucket though!

fusenumber8 said...

To some degree, this has been done. Adults who feel nostalgic for the books of their youth take their now mature sensibilities and do over formerly innocent kids' books. So you have, "Confessions of a Teenage Sleuth" where Nancy Drew has sex with one of the Hardy Boys. Or take, "Dog Sees God", the play that's on Broadway right now. In it the Peanuts characters are adults, Snoopy's dead, and nobody's dealing very well. You could make an argument that this is a new and hip genre. Then tell that to a publisher, get a book deal, and you're all set!

Eric "Babe" Morse said...

One step behind the curve I am, always.
And that Nancy Drew thing: Just wrong.