So I'm watching Family Feud with my father-in-law, and learn that they're sponsored by this product:
Now, I'm all for truth in advertising. But, man, they're not beating about the bush here. In case you're unclear what a colon is, there is a drawing right on the bottle. I felt like I was seeing a fake ad, like on SNL. I guess I like a little more mystery in my names: Correctol. Metamucil. Anyone who needs these products knows what they're used for, and doesn't need a graphic description. With Fibercon, you can be regular, without having to look at a picture of a colon sitting on your kitchen counter while you fix dinner.
Speaking of SNL fake ads, the one that came to mind was for ColonBlow®, a cereal Phil Hartman pitched. At the time, it was over-the-top. Now, there's not a lot of exaggeration in it. Now, this is the way they're pitching this stuff. As a matter of fact, someone's co-opted the name and is selling it as a real product. I don't suggest going to this site.
note: An acquaintance had colon cancer awhile back, and had to have a fairly big chunk removed. I asked if now it was called a semi-colon.
note #2 We have a town in Michigan called Colon. It's known as the "Magic Capital of the World." How about that? We have a Hell, too. I'd rather live in Hell than Colon.
Finally, now is the perfect time to tell the world about the sight gag in my blog title graphic. It's "SPASTIC", followed by a ":". If you don't get it, say it out loud. This was not my idea. Props to Nick.
I know someone was waiting for me to say this post was a load of crap, but it ain't gonna happen.